Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Well... that was weird...

Last year our laptop broke and i stopped blogging for a couple months while we saved to replace it... and then i cant remember why i never started back up....
I love to blog, since this is where i am the best at keeping track of the things we do and the funny things K says.
Its a great outlet for frustration, creativity and my only replacement for scrap-booking and journaling (since we all know i'm not gonna do that).
So yes, that year off was weird for so many reasons.... This last year has been so full of incredibly hard times, crazy happenings and happy moments. I'm a little sad i wasn't better at getting those memories down... oh well maybe i can catch up furiously over the next couple of months
Hold onto your hats! You followers!! Er.. follower (Mom)

I think i'll just briefly start with the story of Bennett's arrival:

Sweet, sweet, happy baby Bennett was NOT planned. In fact, we were actively trying NOT to get pregnant. Which, in contrast to the struggle the first time was a huge shock!
It was on a trip to visit the Driggers in AL, when i noticed i had packed some [feminine products] and not used them. I am nothing if not punctual.
Once i realized this, I quickly purchased tests at the local Huntsville Target and couldn't even wait to leave the store before using one.
The first witness to the impending arrival was Carrie. My shock was evident and with trembling hands decided to wrap up a gift to tell BJ.
It happened to be his birthday and the whole family went out to dinner to celebrate, and in front of everyone he opened my gift.
I was a little terrified that, if i had told him in private, he would've been sad/upset/angry and needed him (even if pretend) to be happy about the news.
Well he put on a good face but we were both terrified about the financial aspect of it, along with having another person sharing our already cramped quarters, and being responsible for yet another human beings welfare! Overwhelmed doesn't begin to describe how we felt.
Guilt for feeling scared.
Thrilled to experience baby times again!
Fear of the un-known $$, how we were going to afford everything with poor insurance, working/daycare etc.
Elation at the feel of every kick!
Sadness at the thought that I was putting more pressure on BJ.
I felt a little bi-polar as i'm sure many pregnant woman can relate to.

This pregnancy was harder, i got sicker and was bone-tired a lot of the time. I referred to new baby as a jerk for making me so sick.

Its amazing how that can all fly away the moment you see that tiny, innocent face.
My water broke at 2 a.m. on my birthday 2 weeks before my due date. He was born at 12:25 a.m. the next morning. We were so close to sharing a birthday! Going into labor could not have been a better birthday present, having been put on bed rest a couple weeks before and it was driving me bonkers!

He came quickly after several hours of crazy yoga poses to get him in the right position.
Thank heaven for epidurals!!
His beautiful perfect face greeted me and he hasn't stopped making me smile since! Seriously the happiest baby I have ever known!!